Thursday, February 13, 2014

The Game

This is the first poem I've written that isn't based on personal experience . . . . . .

a mind that's constantly in overdrive
as soft sweet whispers lead them deep inside
searching their eyes, as dusk turns into night
ignoring the truth, they'd prefer you lied
gagged and bound by a ridiculous wage
there was love once, you thought you were saved
laughing . . . what a gullible fool you made
a broken nose and a bloodied bruised face
too many questions by an anxious nurse
profusely sweating like a whore in church
thinking "this is bad", but it could get worse
praying they won’t look inside your purse
broken and unraveled you turn your back
“I’m done, I quit”, that’s all there is to that
 

Prompt: Over at dVerse they have us creating a Bout Rimes poem using the words drive, side, night, lied, wage, saved, made, face, nurse, church, worse, purse, back and that.

*********

For your chance to win a copy of  'The Edge Of Silence: a collection of poetry and prose' click HERE.
 

26 comments:

  1. best to quit while you are ahead...or at least before they catch you...smiles...now what is in that purse? haha sounds like this love went bad fast...

    ReplyDelete
  2. I how the prompt words fit in so well here ;)

    ReplyDelete
  3. ooof. my mother worked in Adult Protective Services for over 20 years, and some of the stories... ~

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I can only imagine . . . I think it takes a strong person to work in fields like that.

      Delete
  4. oh it's best to quit games like that .... there will be no winner in the end anyway...well played on the emotions..

    ReplyDelete
  5. Glad it's not based on personal experience.. emotional.. seamless incorporation of the vocabulary.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Doesn't sound like a very fun game at all. You put the reader right there with the anxious nurse, and like the person who quit, I sure wanted to get out of that situation.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Glad that this is not based on personal experience ... smiles. You've made great use of the prompt's line-endings in this smooth sonnet about a dangerous situation.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Oooh, quite hard-hitting, this one. Perhaps because I was reading something set in a prison, it reminded me of something in a mental asylum or other closed community.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. For some reason my mind went to prostitution.

      Delete
  9. very nice. We used the words in a similar way.

    ReplyDelete
  10. So glad it is not about you - a sad tale well told.
    Anna :o]

    ReplyDelete
  11. Abuse is for all the wrong reasons surrounded by shame and denial.. and the strangest thing it's the victim ... not the abuser....

    ReplyDelete
  12. Oh! Such brokenness of the victims... exasperating and saddening at the same time. You have taken a sensitive topic and managed it in a manner keeping both emotions intact. Well-penned.
    -HA

    ReplyDelete
  13. So good in a sad kind of way...words woven so well.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Yes, best to say "I quit" rather than have to worry what they might find in your purse…you have captured the spiral of abuse well, and the feelings, with a gentle touch. Nicely (sadly) done (and yes, very glad it is NOT based on your own experience)

    ReplyDelete
  15. Powerful and a tough situation to find oneself. Very nicely penned Kathryn

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you . . . this was an interesting exercise for me.

      Delete
  16. Wonderful use of the prompt words. They fit this write--and subject--like they were made for it. Best response to this prompt, in my humble opinion!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you for such a lovely comment. :0)

      Delete
  17. wow, you did a great job... i'm not always a fan of rhyming poetry, but this felt completely natural!

    ReplyDelete
  18. quite a striking and intense piece. definitely not a game I'd care to find myself in...though I suppose no one really would...

    ReplyDelete