Sunday, November 4, 2012

At A Loss

 
I feel as though my photography has lost its edge and the creative spark has all but been extinguished.
 
I realize that things like putting a house up for sale, packing away art supplies, moving into a new home, setting up in a new state, creating a new studio, having a puppy in the house, a torn cartilage, surgery and physio have all contributed to a slowing down, a break in creativity but I can't help the frustration I feel.
 
My head says to go easy on myself, to stop giving myself such a hard time but my heart sits here and ponders if my muse is going to show up again and whether it will be anytime soon.

11 comments:

  1. You have gone through so much - changes both good and difficult. And it is hard to be patient, to wait for the photography muse to return - that feeling that we have taken our last good photograph is so disheartening and painful. I think we just have to keep picking up the camera and trust that it will return - as it always has in the past.

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    1. Thanks Brenda, disheartening and painful describes it perfectly. I'll keep searching and hope that it returns soon.

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  2. just writing this post is creativity....

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  3. All of these roadblocks slow you down, but you have natural talent, so it may take a little time before your creativity returns, and it will :^)

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  4. You will get it back! You have passion! I have always believed there is a reason for everything. Maybe you needed this time to take a break, and in time you will get back the spark that makes your heart sing. Be well Kathryn!

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  5. Your muse will show up again.... without a doubt. You've had quite a tense time with so many changes and stresses. You need time to fill the well again and that only happens when you slow down and catch up with yourself. Thinking of you xo

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  6. We all have our ups and downs as far as being or feeling creative. You can't force it. It's not gone, it's just resting. :)

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  7. It's ironic to read this now, since I've been spending the afternoon catching up on blogs and I've gone through several of yours, thinking each time, "How does she capture such magical images?" So, first I would say that, while you may feel as if you've lost your spark, it's still shining bright in the work you are posting here.
    Second, as others have written above, you've gone through so much lately. You're going to be tired. Last year, when I got a concussion, everything slowly. Stopped. I couldn't write or read AT ALL for months. And I thought I was Done, with a capital D. It comes back. It's who you are. Have faith -- I do.

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    1. I can't believe it was a year ago you got your concussion, I remember how hard it was for you to write and read and can relate to how scary that must have felt. I think I feel frustrated, because I was in extreme pain with the facial nerve issue for a year an a half and then right when I was getting that somewhat under control with medication the issues with my knee started. Both have made it hard for me to get out and do all the things I would normally do but I guess the trick is taking one day at a time and to keep pushing. There have been times when I've thought about throwing in the towel but if I'm not an artist or a blogger and I'm not taking photos then who am I?

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    2. I know exactly what you mean. I had chronic neck/back pain for about 15 years (yup!) before I found some real, working solutions. Then, the concussion. It is frustrating. And sometimes one day at a time is too long. Sometimes, it's an hour at a time :)
      The thing is, no matter what you're doing right this minute, you are still you, full of creative spirit, with an incomparable eye and talent. Forget the towel. Hold onto that! (and hug the dog. that helps too.)

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