Thursday, September 27, 2012

The Gift Of 'I Love You'

Telling my parents how much I loved them, the kisses, the cuddles, the tickling and laughter . . . it was all so easy as a young child.  Then childhood gave way to teenage years and suddenly saying "I love you" was no longer cool.  Kisses and hugs given only under protest (if at all).
Entering my 20's brought a different perspective and I found that hugging and kissing loved ones was ok again.  The "I love you's" though, somehow they were harder.  I could put them in writing but whenever someone said those three words the best I could do was reply "me too".
The year I turned 30 was a tough one.  I thought he would always be there but I guess Cancer had other ideas.  Holding my dad's hand in his final moments, the words "I love you" were suddenly held hostage by my sobs.  When someone is dying hearing is the last sense to go.  I wish I could have found my voice that day and whispered those words to him as he left us.
His death was a wake up call in so many ways but saying "I love you" was an important one.  It made me realize what a gift those three little words can be.  Now I'm left wondering why I never said it more and if my dad were alive today I wouldn't hesitate to tell him how much I love him followed swiftly by a big kiss and a hug.

Happy Birthday Dad and thank you for the gift of "I Love You".

Wednesday, September 26, 2012


Our little girl is growing up so fast.  She has her cute moments but she can be very wilful too.
Most of the time she knows if she's doing something wrong but will do it anyway.
It's as if you can see the cloggs turning as she's thinking.
She loves to have something constantly in her mouth.  Most of the time its rawhide or a chew toy . . .
but this morning she managed to go through one pair of underwear, one sock, a rubber glove, some cardboard, kitchen roll and a couple of poor unsuspecting insects all before lunchtime.
I honestly don't know where she finds half of these things.

I love her to bits but I have to tell you that cats are so much easier!

Tuesday, September 25, 2012

Like Blows To Her Soul

tick, tock, tick, tock
the incessant beat of seconds passing like blows to her soul
tick, tock, tick, tock
resonating through her core, undoing her cell by cell
 tick, tock, tick, tock
plucking at her nerves like an unskilled harpist
tick, tock, tick, tock
each one louder than the last, laughing at her, mocking her
tick, tock, tick, tock
her own heart beat growing louder, unwilling to be outdone
tick, tock, tick, tock
a form of personal torture
tick, tock, tick, tock
the seconds continue unperturbed

Wednesday, September 19, 2012

Black As Night

She opened her eyes but could see nothing for the room was pitch black.  It was the early hours of the morning and she could hear her husband sleeping soundly beside her.  Not wanting to wake him she moved slowly and softly, untangling herself from the covers as she crept out of bed.

Her steps were timid, arms outstretched before her, feeling blindly for obstacles that might barr her way.  The layout of her new home not entirely familiar yet, especially in a state of half sleep.  She cursed as she tripped over a dog toy . . . left abandoned on the floor from the previous evening.  Finding her way to the sofa she sunk into its cushions, feeling the coolness of the space as the 'blackness, continued to wrap itself around her.

The stillness . . . . the quietness soothed her.

Thursday, September 13, 2012

Who Are You Calling A Bird?

I've been so busy trying to get the house all squared away that I haven't had time to get our bird feeders out.  I've been missing my feathered friends so was happy when I discovered these photos I took during my visit home to the UK earlier in the year.

Don't you just love the colors on display?

I've spied some cardinals so far but will be interested to see what other birds will be visiting during the different seasons.  What are your favorite feathered visitors where you live?

Monday, September 10, 2012


"Different fields, different grasshoppers; different seas, different fish".

Indonesian Proverb

Wednesday, September 5, 2012


The change in air pressure was a sign . . . the thunder, the rain, the lightening just a part of the show.  It was always there, sitting, waiting and now it was time.  Time to sharpen its talons.  Time to sink them deep into her flesh, ensnaring her in its hold.
She braced herself for she knew what was coming but still it took her by surprise.  The intensity, the force, the searing pain.  Stumbling, clutching her head she searched for some kind of remedy.  Something that could release its grasp and banish it back to whence it came.
The thunder passed overhead and became a low rumble in the distance.  Flashes of lightening noticeably absent as the clouds parted and hope shone through.  She felt the internal shift as each talon slowly retracted and the searing pain was replaced with a dull ache.